Saturday, December 20, 2008
? The look in your eyes is you're dying to kiss me ¿
I can't imagine why that would be frustrating at all — just because someone refuses to tell you what they're thinking, even if all the while they're making cryptic little remarks specifically designed to keep you up at night wondering what they could possibly mean... now, why would that be frustrating?
Y'know what, as much as I say I am not going to be bothered about you, I hate what you're doing right now. I don't care if you find me a nuisance but if you really think so, look at yourself. You fucking are the moron. Fine by me if you don't wish to care about me, don't wish to be reminded of me, you or us & what we used to do & have. But what you are doing right now, is ruining yourself & your life. Do you remember what we agreed on? I am leading my life like how I used to, 'cept now that I am without you. Maybe happier than before, maybe less happier than before. But I still lead my life normally. So tell me, what are you doing now. Is this your life? Is this leading "life as per normal"? Fucking hell no.
Stop it, I am dead fucking serious. Stop doing what you are doing. Stop fucking yourself up, stop fucking your studies up, stop fucking your life up. You are giving up on yourself, so are your friends. Your friends. He can say "this sem ah, I don't think can have As la" about you already, do you know what the fucking hell does that mean? This is not you. This is not the you I know..
Start being yourself luv, it's making me upset to see you like that :(
x
As he told me what he thinks I should do, his eyes were filled with concern. He helped me by listening to me & help me with what I needed to know most of the time. I saw a different friend in him that I've never met before. It was this part of him that I never though I'd see. I felt unique to have him. A keeper, definitely. xoxo to you :)
Suggestions given? Talk. Set a trap & meet up.
I said yes to none, no to all.
While typing this, and also analyzing what he & she has told me, I've decided that I will do something about it by myself.
This weekend I'll be busy with two essays to complete, two presentations to prepare for, one fucking dumb letter from my parents to Mr Naidu/Wolverine to write, getting 60 goodie bags from Daiso + candycanes, sweets & chocolates from supermarket enough for 60 pax, xmas cards to be sent out, payment in for the girls' xmas gifts (aren't you excited girlies), and xmas gift list to be out.
Tsktsk I foresee a sleepless, draining weekend ahead...
P/s: Look at the time................................
Labels: emotional ramblings, emotions, photos, pictures, saturday, thoughts
e_motionallystripped